Day 14. Sept 14.

So… Yesterday I posted this gung-ho post on how I’m ready & I’m doing it!

And I did great yesterday!

Until…

Yesterday afternoon I went to my hairdresser & she offered me a glass of wine!

What’s a girl to do?

So it was an itty bitty prob 2 oz swig of the yummiest red wine. Prob didn’t do much harm.

But then..

The husband called & he was at his mammas…

She’s cooking dinner, but I know you’re on your diet… ugh…those dreaded words.

Love her cooking. Hate when I’m on a diet.

Here’s the big thing for me….

I hate attention.

Like especially when it’s for something I’m insecure about…like my never ending weight loss ploys.

So..even though it prob would have been easy for me to grab a meat only entree on the way to her house..I hate “being different” Or if I would have ate just the meat (even though it was a breaded & fried) and not ate the scrumptious sides…then I feel like I will offend someone by not eating things. Or I’m scared they will ask why I don’t want any…and then I have to say..I’m on a diet. Or..the other people that are there will see me bring in other food or get just one thing on my plate & be like…how rude. Or..they will sit there & wonder why I am eating weird. And then I’m paranoid the whole time.

Like seriously…this is the stuff that goes through my head.

Every. Single. Time.

So basically…like I said. I just want to be normal. I don’t like to eat different in front of others & have to explain myself or feel paranoid by not explaining myself. At a restaurant it’s ok..b/c you just order whatever & nobody notices…but at someone’s house where everyone is served the same meal…it’s quite the epic battle in muh head.

So…

dun dun dunnn…

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And it was sooooo yum.

Every guilty bite.

And then..I may or may not have had an oatmeal cookie & glass of milk later that night.

That stinkin thinkin again! Well…I already messed up…might as well finish it off! Ugh!

So..wayyy over my calories I was!

But since I had an ok day. I guess that meal really didn’t hurt me that bad. It DID throw out my 3 days of protein/no carbs-get me in fat burning mode/ketosis thing.

BUT…it didn’t halt my weight loss b/c this morning:

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Down 2 lb’s exactly!

It’s very encouraging!

If the number had been up..then I would have been like..oh well..gotta start all over anyway..might as well milk it a few days..Then I would be up 5 lbs before I started my diet again..and have to RElose that 5 lbs all over again! Continuing that vicious cycle & getting me nowhere!

But the numbers are encouraging. So..it keeps me going. I’m going to pretend like last night didn’t happen & keep going w/ my no carbs for a few more days. Imperfect Progress..Keep moving the line forward. 

Breakfast this morn:

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Now..hopefully…I can resist temptation in Ft. Worth this weekend.

My goal is to eat my diet ALL weekend…except the birthday dinner meal…MEXICAN FOOD!

And maybe. JUST MAYBE..that one meal won’t throw me off track, rather serve as a reward for not gorging myself while I’m out of town.

Wish me luck!

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