Did you know…

So…I’m a food loggin slacker. Actually, I’m pretty much a dieting loser, but most definitely not in the literal way.

I wrote this post about Why I Love My Fitness Pal like forever ago in my faithful calorie counting days…and then…completely fell off the L-B losing wagon for awhile.

But now that 2015 is here, along with the new year, new me bandwagon mentality…I dusted off my ol MFP app & took another go at it.

And surprise, surprise! New features on my beloved app!

The coolest, most rad new feature…it tracks your steps! Oh yeah!

Forget the FitBit, there’s a new tracker in town! Of course…if you have a FitBit that you just die over…you can use that instead & sync that baby up to MFP to automatically give you some cookie calories for those crunches.


So…hop on over to your MFP app & take a looksy around.




Let’s do this…

So…I signed up for Mama Laughlin’s DietBet.


Hopefully the idea of losing my money will get me motivated.

My goal is to at least make my money back.

In case you are new to the whole Diet Bet thing…you only have to lose 4% of your starting weight to make your bet money back. Then at the end of the game…everyone who did that splits the pot.

I’m banking on the fact that over half these folk will flake out halfway through.


People are allll about that lifestyle change on Jan 1. But two weeks in…it’s but a mere memory.


So..here’s to hoping I can stick with it this year. I got my plan laid out which includes a little bit of accountability…starting with this Diet Bet thing. So..let’s do this.



Click the link at the top of the post to join me!…or leave your email & I will send you an invitation!

Are you a logger?…

Are you on the MyFitnessPal train? Are you all about that loggin??


Well are you going to be giddy over this!

MyRecipes + MyFitnessPal = Calorie-Counting Bliss

MyRecipes.com has added a  new LOG IT button! Whoop Whoop!

log it



Just find that meal you wanna make, then click the Log It button to transfer all the nutritional info for that recipe RIGHT into your MyFitnessPal account!

Whaaa?!!?  Thank you technology for making my life that. much. easier.






Wait. What?! It’s Wednesday?

Oh…it is Wednesday already??

I almost forgot until I saw the Humpday posts flooding my IG feed.

reaction Liz-lemon-eye-roll-gif


Seriously ya’ll….even the camel is over that damn joke.



OR…he could just look like that because Miley violated him.



Whatevs…either way…the ridiculous amount of Hump Day crap reminded me that it is in fact…Weight. What?! Wednesday.


Womp. Wooomp.


Obviously this is not going as planned. I feel like a loser when I have to post my weight & it’s higher than the previous week…AND OF COURSE…that is the whole point of Weight. What?! Wednesday….to make myself accountable and know that I am posting it on the blog…. therefore make me stay in check….except it really doesn’t.

Because..well…although I usually start every other day out with good intentions…


Life throws me vomit & laundry…

and add to that being stuck in the house all day..with the perfect ingredients to make the perfect sandwich just taunting me…


And DAMN, just DAMN…I really need that greasy, cheesy, mayonaissey, goodness to deal.

In fact…I would say…I deserve it!

Except people…the problem is that is my life everyday.

One healthy meal…17 bad meals.

I blame it on Eve...

I blame it on Eve…

Good intentions…no follow through.

One revelation…25 excuses.

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I have tried to make small changes and have stuck with a few…like no soft drinks…and…uh…ok well that’s really it.  Everything else I keep slipping back into old habits.


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Ha…maybe I need to take my own advice! Well…my goal is always the same…and I will always keep trying to reach it…but I for sure need to come up  with some better methods because what I’m doing is obviously not working.

So…tell me…how do you stay motivated through the tough times when you just want to quit?

In other big news…

Frozen came out on DVD yesterday!

Just in case you live under a rock & didn’t know.

Because OMG obviously you’re the only one that ran out & bought the movie. I’m pretty sure every daggum person in America had Frozen on the tv yesterday. I even ordered it for my sick kid off PPV….but guess what….I didn’t POST it…GASP!!! #Bandwagonmuch?


In other fun news…in between loads of laundry and disinfecting EVERYTHING…I found funnies to text muh man.

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Maybe these were just funny to us considering my husbands obsession with Craigslist & our ongoing debate about  Bigfoot’s existence.

When I came across this I just got a little creeped out…

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Haha! Maybe I should take it as a sign to suck it up & quit being a baby about this diet thing!



Is being fat really all that bad anyway?

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Guest Post Mania: Lift Ladies!

Lift Ladies


Hey, lovers.  It’s Aubrey Leigh from ALG Uninterrupted.

I’m lucky enough to get to take over Nina’s blog today.  Recently Nina did this awesome post that I loved on clean eating.  Check it out here.  It inspired me to do a similar break-it-down sort of post for y’all today on weight lifting.

Listen up, ladies.  YOU MUST LIFT ALL THE THINGS.  The days of doing hours of cardio and starving yourself are over.

I mean, you can do that, but you’re going to get a very specific result.  And it’s going to be a “skinny fat.”

Let’s go ahead and get this out of the way.  There are two primary reasons women don’t lift weights:

1.  They think it will bulk them up.

2.  They think it is the exclusive province of men.

I’m hear to tell you that neither is the case.  Take it from me, my body is the leanest it has ever been at 175 lbs. (which I have been several times in my crazy yo-yo life), because I lift weights.

Left is 192.  Right is 175.

And the bros of the world do not have a lock on lifting.  I guarantee if you start now, you’ll find more and more women that swear by it.  I can’t ever remember being this satisfied with how I look at this weight.  Don’t get me wrong, I still have a ways to go, but my body is so much firmer (read: SMALLER) this time around because I’ve been lifting.

Alright, so let’s assume I’ve convinced you.  What do you do?  I don’t think you need a personal trainer (although they’re great) or a gym membership (although they’re awesomesauce). Here’s what I’d recommend you do:

Go to a discount store like TJ Maxx, Kohl’s, Marshall’s, etc., and find their fitness section.  I say this because, while you can go to Academy Sports or the like, they’re just cheaper at these places!  These discount stores will likely have awesome free weights, mats, medicine balls, foam rollers, weight bands, and on and on.  Every one I’ve ever been to has a decent selection.

Now, go here to bodybuilding.com and follow the steps to get a FREE fitness plan that will include all the details you need.  I love this website.  It has examples of how to do ALL the things.  Good form is key to avoiding injury.  I also really love shape.com.  It has tons and tons of free information.  Also, WebMD has a great Exercise and Fitness Center here. There is literally endless free information online about how to get started.  Just make sure you use a reputable and somewhat scholarly source.

So, if you do have a gym membership like me, and you’re just starting out, I recommend you start with the machines.  The weight machines have instructions on them.  In the rare case they don’t, ask one of the idle gym attendants who are normally standing around texting their boos or folding towels how to work the machines.  In the past, I’ve had a personal trainer.  She did teach me some good basics, but 9 times out of 10, the instructions on are on the machine.  Plop down and read them.

Here’s what I started with:

As you can see, I didn’t even know what everything was called.  I just made up things in my notes to remind myself of what exercise I did.

And here’s what I did last time I lifted:



I aim to either increase reps or increase weight (but not both), each time I go.  And each time I go, I get more and more confident in my form and my ability.  And each time I go, I build more muscle mass which is burning calories for me when I sleep.
And if all that doesn’t convince you.  Here.

Do it because Marilyn did.
Love y’all,

Weight Loss Tips from a Skinny Bitch…

This week I’m totally bailing on Weight. What?! Wednesday again. Not just because my life is super crazy busy between my demanding VIP job & my demanding VIP family…but mostly because I can’t get my shit together and don’t want to keep posting that the scale is up & not down. Let’s just say my New Year’s Resolution isn’t really going as planned….



Dontcha just hate skinny bitches?



Skinny Bitches can’t be real life right?

I mean c’mon….trying not to be fat is HARD & they act like it’s nothing.



BUT…since I’ve joined the blogging world…I’m learning that even the skinny bitche’s struggle is real.

Since I can’t seem to get my blog butt in gear…


…I’ve got an equally as awesome guest blogger for you today.

Queen Skinny Bitch herself, Rikki.

If you’ve never been to Rikki’s blog…you are missing some serious shit. I for real get giddy every time I see a new post from Momma’s Got a Dude’s Name in my Bloglovin feed.  She’s hilarious & her humor is just me.

Check. Her. Out. Stat.

And with that I  present to you:

Weight Loss Tips

Don’t tune out just yet. 

I may have a point. 

(but you are skinny and I hate you)

That’s okay. But honestly, do you want legal advice from a convict? 

Do you want math tutoring from a flunk out? 

Do you want financial advice from a poor person swimming in debt? 

I hope the answer is a resounding NO because anything else would be dumb. 

So here is my story: 

The most I have ever weighed is 150 lbs. That’s about 20lbs higher than I ever should have weighed but I didn’t feel bad about myself at 145. I just had a little extra cushion and a bigger trunk for my junk. 

I honestly did not think I really needed to lose any weight. I looked healthy. 

Then I went to the doctor for one of my check ups and he informed me I had high cholesterol. 


I have a normal BMI. 

I was 28 years old. 

What the hell? 

Immediately, I told the doc, “But I love eggs!” 


And I do  ya’ll. I could live on eggs and bacon. 

You know what he said, “Good. Keep eating them.” 


Yeah. He said the new research coming out is that processed foods are what is causing A LOT of our medical problems INCLUDING high cholesterol. Also, our body removes cholesterol that is ingested almost entirely. High cholesterol tends to be the body making too much, not ingesting too much.

So he recommended to me what I have now termed the reverse racism diet: 

No whites. 

No white flour. 
No white sugar. 
No white rice. 
No white potatoes. 

That’s right. 

I looked at him with big puppy dog eyes and said, “But the carbs! I loves the carbs!” 

He said, “How does Lipitor sound?” 

Dammit if he doesn’t know me. I don’t like taking medicine. Nevermind that I take what seems like a million pills a day, but I wasn’t adding another one! 

So I took his challenge. I had six weeks to re-test my cholesterol and see if I did a good job. 

Six weeks later: 

I had lost 15 lbs and my cholesterol was down 50 pts

I feel so much better. 

I look so much better. 

Would exercise help?

Sure. But I don’t want to. It gets in the way of my lying around time. 

Now, for a guilty snack I have some dark chocolate dipped in peanut butter. 

I’ll eat a hamburger plain or wrapped in lettuce instead of bread. 

I pass on cookies, cakes, etc. If I do indulge, I have very little or I have whole wheat (not pretend whole wheat. I’m talking Ezekiel bread). 

And to be honest I’ve never felt better about myself. 

And my body revolts if I eat the stuff now. Stomach cramps, feel nauseous… the whole nine yards. And I’m okay with that because it just proved to me how much it did to me before, I was just used to it.  

I am now down 20ish lbs and sitting at a lovely 125lbs. I have fun shopping now. I feel great. I have way more self confidence. 

Take it from a skinny bitch, this works.  

Ignore the mess. I’m skinny, not clean.




Weight. What?! Wednesday.



Well well Wednesday…so we meet again.

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Meh…ya know.

I’m happy that it is down 1.6 from last Wednesday..but a little sad that it is up a 0.6 from yesterday. And I may or may not have moved the scale to 17 different locations in the bathroom and leaned 12 different ways just trying to maybe make it show the 216.4 if showed yesterday. Just maybe though.

But hey…it’s my own fault. I was trucking along doing quite well thank you very much..& then this happened:


ALL THE FOOD & ALL THE SODIUM…I just knew I would be up 2 lbs this morning! Thank you little baby Jesus it was only about 1/2 a pound!

It SHO was good though! Thanks to my husband for taking the fam out! I think he wanted to do something to get Daynie’s mind off this:

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She got her expander in yesterday! AND…it was quite the dramatic process! Any moms of 9 year old drama queens out there that can sympathize?

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Poor baby really couldn’t eat yesterday…but she loved to sip that soup!

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I find it a bit ironic that I was chowing down on a the above yesterday when my clean eating post went live. Haha!

Obviously ya’ll if I could stick to a 100% clean diet my scale would be going down a lot faster!

Dontcha just hate when you see something & that’s it BAM you crave it until you get it?? Yesterday, when I picked my kid’s up some lunch at Subway I saw that cookie AND I KNEW….that was it…either go ahead & give in and get that damn cookie or spend two weeks thinking about that cookie.

So you know what?

Oh wait..you already know…I bought the dang cookie.

But what you don’t know is…it wasn’t even that good. I ate half & trashed the rest.

And there ya go. Craving satisfied so I don’t UHBSESSSSS over it for all the dayzzz…but really didn’t even crash my whole diet either.

Gotta get that balance people.

I’m obviously a work in progress.

Trial & error baby.

How do you balance your cravings?

Link up Ladies!

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