If you are wondering why I’ve been M.I.A. from the blog world for like evaaaa….then you’ll just have to wonder a little bit longer. #sorrynotsorry . Ok I am sorry for using that lame hashtag. #not.
Have no fear! I will be back in the blogosphere in full force soon enough!
For now…enjoy this repost from Back to School stuff from last year….
When I was a kid…I was lucky to get this:
Like O. M. G. I’m totally going to spend 3 hours every night carefully crafting my rotten child’s lunch into the most adorbs little creations so I can totally be the coolest mom on the block. THANKS PINTEREST!
Crazy mom say whaaaaat??
Although the latest Pinterest craze of fun kids lunches is cute….that’s all it is. Cute.
It’s just NOT practical!
Step away from the mouse! Don’t you pin that!
Hey! Don’t do it! DON’T PIN IT FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS SANE!
Shrimp? Really? SHRIMP????
I’m sure that is ganna be fresh & smell spectacular come lunch time. Your child’s teacher thanks you.
The skewer lunch above would just result in pissing my kids off. That wouldn’t fill their tummies. Daynie would open her lunch box & be all…”W-T-F MOM?!”
This giraffe is soooooo cute. Umm…yeah…but it’s sure the hell not practical!
I’m sure this kid appreciates the amount of bread you just wasted to perfect each body part:
I mean…is THIS practical?? What a WASTE…
You ganna eat YO cone-bread?
Where’s the rest of the orange?
Did you REALLY just cut open a whole orange to use ONE slice to make a sun? Mom, c’mon…I’m starving here…can you stop teasing me & let me eat the WHOLE orange?
This looks fun:
I’m sure the Cafeteria Monitor Nazi’s are totally going to be into letting the kids play just one more game before eating their lunch.
I’m sure this will remain intact by lunch time:
And these?? Don’t EVEN get me started on THESE!
DIY Re-usable snack lunch bags?
Because the 200 pack of ziploc bags for $1 at Wal-Mart isn’t practical OR going to save you time & money. Hmph.
Do I even need to touch on CLEANING THOSE THINGS??
Mom’s…you’re setting the bar wayyy too high.
Think of your child’s devastation on the days they open their lunch box to see this:
Oh & BTW…I did 7 instead of 6 b/c 7 is a way more awesomer number than 6.
So suck it 6!
I’m not tagging anyone b/c I would totes die a thousand deaths of embarrassment if my famous blogging colleagues blew me off and didn’t do it. Totes dead. And we all know that staying alive is numero uno on muh bucket list. So that’s out.
So I was scanning Pinterest the other night & came across this awesome recipe for ice.
I immediately rolled my eyes bc obvi people don’t have to make ice…that’s what refrigerators are for.
But then I got to thinking…what if by some crazy chance I end up in a 3rd world country on Naked & Afraid and need to use my survival skills to make ice? So I decided to go ahead and read up on the subject..ya know…just in case.
Upon clicking on the pin…I was brought to this amazing recipe..
But ZERO freakin carbs isn’t even the best part!!! Check the reviews on this recipe!
TEARS in my eyes!!
To view the recipe & hours of hilariousity…click here.
The next video isn’t as funny as it is awesome! Your mouth will be open in shock at how cool this maid of honor is…until the end when she gets a standing ovation. If my sista hyjacked my day & got the crowd to go wild like she’s the Jonas’ brother’s long lost sister…I’d punch her in the throat & smear wedding cake in her face.
And last but most certainly not least…
The train wreck we call Miley.
If you follow me on InstaGram…you know I posted this after watching her latest vid.
The first 3 times I watched this I thought…what a whack job…is she serious?
By the 5th view I have since changed my view of Miley from freak show to PURE GENIUS.
It’s seriously such a crazy train wreck you can’t look away. You watch it over & over. You share it with every poor soul that will make fun of it with you.
Marketing genius Miley.
She set out to make a completely outrageous, get all them bitches talkin video.
I mean look at me..I’ve watched it more times than I care to share without looking like a whack-a-doodle and now I’m blogging about it.
Probably from my post alone her YouTube views will shoot from 45 million to eighty-ten bazillion.
You’re welcome Miley.
Oh yeah..check this chick’s post on the video out…